Monday, October 21, 2013

sicky sick sick

I seriously think the flu spray poisoned Olive. She seriously has not been the same since she got it. She has had two sicknesses since then (which I think is totally normal with the start of preschool) but they haven't been her normal sick. She has always had a pretty consisted sick pattern, I mean as a mom you just know what your kid is like when they are sick. But she has had something lingering since a few days after her birthday party. It started as a cough and has moved into a cold/flu/fever. It's awful. She has been pretty sick all weekend and today while I think she was better she just isn't right. She is a super healthy kid and her sicks usually last 2-3 days at the most. I'm just saying that flu spray is bad bad news. This house will NEVER get anything flu related again ever. I should have stuck to my hippy dippy ways and said no. While I'm sure her dr will say it has nothing to do with the shot I call bullshit. My mom gut tells me it wasn't right. 

So this weekend I was able to get a little friend time which let me tell you was so beyond needed. My friend and I went to a private screening of the movie Bad Grandpa. I honestly had no interest in the movie but holy shit balls it was funny. I'm not a laugh out loud kinda girl but I was laughing so damn hard the whole time. It was good to have a few drinks and adult conversation. Lets hope I can pump some milk so this wont be my last night out. I have a girls day planned on sunday with a few friends and I'm freaking out I will have to cancel with this whole milk thing. I have a stash for two feedings but its just not enough. I love being with my kids all day but these little breaks are so needed to refresh myself and remember who I am cause trust me I forget sometimes. That and Blake seems to be getting home later and later every night. What started at 6:45 is now 7:30. While that might not seem late in normal people life making dinner, getting the kids in the bath, and putting Otto to bed by 7 when Olive is still awake is quite the balancing act. I get grumpy and tired and while most days I can handle it some days are just hard. With the late nights it means I don't get to go to kickboxing which somehow makes me feel sane. Mondays are just hard but lets hope tomorrow is better. Trying to think some stress free thoughts and lots and lots of milk! 

movie date. 

tea party. 

popsicles and cool baths make fevers all better! 

free ride. 


my alarm clocks. 

couch nap. 

watching robin. already a howard stern fan. and most important a little start at sitting. 

its more of a slouch but he will sit up and balance for a bit on his own. 


I'm in full panic meltdown mode. I went to pump the other day and nothing came out except a few drops. I figured maybe it was just a bad time so I tried again a bit later and the same thing. NOTHING! So this whole weekend I pretty much spent freaking out that I was starving my baby. I blamed my pump but after a phone call to Medela today all seems to be working. So its me. Otto is super plump, poops and pees like a champ so I have so idea what is going on. I read over and over that this can happen but I just checked the freezer and I have over 9oz of milk from a single pump in the beginning of this month. It's not making sense. I tend to go into full hypochondriac mode with stuff but I feel like since I'm the only source of food keeping my child alive I can panic. I made an appointment with a lactation consultant tomorrow so I can get a before and after weight so at least I know what is going on.  Trying not to freak out and trust my body but in my crazy head I'm freaking out. Thanks boobs.....

Look at my chunky baby!!!!

photo by olive.