I don't think I've ever blogged this much before. I've been posting once or twice daily which is pretty rare for me. Guess I have a lot to say. Today was the first day I purposely skipped a feeding with Olive. I guess it's kinda the start of the weening process, the very slow weening process. I've been thinking about it for the last month or so. I never really set a date or had a goal in mind. I had just planned to go with the flow and see what happens. I kinda thought that she would naturally ween herself but the older she gets it seems the more she wants it. Of course this fills me with mom guilt like no other. I didn't think I would be so sad to start the process of stopping but I also know that my boobs need a little break and I think it's time. I don't actually have a real answer to why I should stop but it just feels like maybe its time. Usually around 4:30 when she starts to get that night time grump on I will put on yo gabba gabba and we will watch it together. Most of the time she will crawl into my lap and nurse. I've never minded or thought twice about it till today. I kept telling her no when she signed for milk and I went and got a sippy of milk and she snuggled in my arms and drank it. She forgot about my boobs for that moment and at least and we were able to make it till bedtime. Luckily she likes milk and has no problem drinking it, just wonder if that will change once she stops getting the boob.
Funny enough I got a phone call from my friend Kristin today. She is also going to start weening her baby and I think she called just to get a little support from me. Sometimes you just want that friend to tell you everything will be ok even when you know it is. No matter how far away we live we always seem to be on the same page. I know she called to get my support but just talking everything out with her made me feel so much better. As always she is the greatest!
It seems like stopping breastfeeding shouldn't be this deep but it is as its been such an important part of my life and such an amazing bonding experience for myself and Olive. I was able to give her something no one else could and feel so so lucky that I had enough milk to do so. I keep trying to talk myself out of it but think its time. If I do this how I want which is slow she will be weened by the time she is 15 months old.
Once she is weened this mom is going bra shopping!!!