Need coffee!!! It was one of those crappy nights last night. We've had some great nights so hoping this was just a random shitty night. Its so hard to remain calm at 3am and try to calm her when all I want to do is scream and cry. She has been up most of the morning, only took a mini nap so hopefully she will be really tired tonight and only take a few more naps. I don't really know how much she is supposed to sleep during the day and you can only do so much to play with a newborn. I'm still learning. I did read to her today and she smiled a few times. It melts my heart! I think she just likes to hear my voice, she could care less what I'm saying.
I'm still being a bit of a homebody during the week. I'm still not ready to take her to indoor type places. Luckily there is a lot I can do that is outdoors but on days where I don't sleep its hard to motivate myself to get out. Plus getting us both ready is a lot of work and I'm still getting used to it. I wish Blake could understand this, he keeps asking me why I don't do this or that but this is all still really new. I will get it eventually and it will be no problem but it will be on my time when I feel comfortable. She isn't even 5 weeks yet. Most people I talk to with babies say they didn't even get out of their pjs for weeks and weeks. So I'm gonna enjoy this time and do what I need to do.